HOW TO HAVE SAFE SEX
PRACTICING GOOD SEXUAL HEALTH IS IMPORTANT
Practicing good sexual health isn't just for heteronormative sex. It's important that you practice good sexual health all the time, even when having sex with another person with a vagina. Not only does it keep ourselves safe, but it also shows respect for the person you're deciding to have sex with
1. Get tested regularly for Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs)
The UK Health Security Agency advises getting tested for STIs every time you change sexual partners. At the very least, you should get tested once a year, and definitely if you think you might have been exposed to an STI. Doing this protects yourself and any current or future sexual partners
2. Practice good hygiene
Don't worry, I'm not about to tell you that you have to shower anytime you want to have sex. However, contrary to popular belief, two vagina owners having sex can still contract STIs from each other.
When two biological females have sex, STIs can contracted from hands. Since fingering and masturbation are common sexual activities for biological females, it's vital that you wash your hands before and after touching your partner's vulva. Make sure you're cleaning underneath your nails too!
3. Consider using dental dams
STIs, such as herpes, can also be passed on through oral sex. Dental dams are latex sheets that cover the vulva as a barrier between an individual's mouth and their partner's vulva. It still feels good for your partner, but just makes sure that you're being safe.
4. Communication is key!
Don't be afraid to discuss each other's personal history! It's important to know whether or not your sexual partner may have been exposed to STIs!
Communication can also be about discussing what you like and don't like when it comes to sex. You can establish before you go into it what your boundaries are, whether you want to use toys and where you like being touched. Don't forget you can change your mind at any point during sex if you want to!
5. Don't forget about lube!
Just because a penis isn't involved, it doesn't mean lube can't enhance your sexual experience. Using lube when fingering or masturbating can prevent any unwanted friction that might be uncomfortable for you or your partner. It also comes in handy if you decide you want to use sex toys or a strap-on during sex.
6. Consider using a safe word
Your first queer sexual experience can be a scary and daunting thing but deciding on a safe word before you begin can help ease some of that anxiety. A safe word can be any word that, when spoken, you and your partner know that all sexual activity in that moment must stop.
Deciding on a safe word with your sexual partner before sex means you can easily stop any sexual activity if you become too overwhelmed or anxious. It's also always important to use a safe word if you're engaging in sexual kinks or BDSM.
7. Sex can 'finish' whenever you decide
The great thing about sex between two biological females is that, in theory, it can be never-ending. Biological females are usually able to orgasm multiple times, meaning there is no limit to how long sex goes on for. It is important to take breaks between sexual activity for water, hand-washing and after-care. Likewise, it's fine to 'finish' sex even if you or your partner haven't reached an orgasm. You can decide when sex 'finishes' whether that's after one orgasm, ten orgasms, or none!
8. Consent, consent, consent!
Your first queer sexual experience can be daunting, but there's a big difference between daunting and uncomfortable! Before engaging in any sexual activity with anyone, it's vital that you give and receive not just consent, but enthusiastic consent. And this can be withdrawn at any time during sex.
Although we recommend remembering these tips when having sex with another biological female, we believe that sex is meant to be fun and the most important thing is that you and your partner enjoy your time together. These things just help to keep you both safe and enhance your sexual experience!